email update - 22 July

I hadn't sent any updates out in a while... it had been difficult to do so. Emotionally difficult, but also... there just wasn't too much to tell. This update was spurred by a query from one of dad's friends at work, and I took advantage of the situation to try to cheer mom up & salvage her birthday.

Hi everyone,
My apologies for not sending out an update lately... things have been so tentative, it's been more difficult than usual. We'll get bad news in the morning, and by that afternoon, it will be better; the next morning will be good but things go badly after that... and so on. Very hard to know what to say.

Although no one can explain it medically, dad is still here and fighting toward recovery. He is still on the ventilator (he'll have a tracheostomy done in the morning), and is unable to do anything other than open his eyes and look around once in a while; but he's making more progress every day. The only really critical factor right now is his kidney, it doesn't show any sign of recovery (although the renal doctors remain optimistic). Toxins that his kidney can't clean out are probably the factor keeping him from being more conscious, and he may also face dialysis for the rest of his life. His other organs are doing ok, but his kidney (and his suppressed consciousness) has put everything else into the background.

Once Dad regains consciousness, I understand that the first goal will be to wean him off of the ventilator. Shortly after that, he will need to begin physical therapy. More than a month of complete inactivity, compounded by the steroids in his system, has taken most of his muscle mass. It will be a lot of work to get anything back (but the physical therapists are optimistic that it will only be a few weeks).

All that being said, he's still in the game, and fighting for everything he's got (he definitely wouldn't be here if he wasn't). He has always loved proving doctors wrong, and he's completely ignoring all of the odds against him. :)

Dad was diagnosed with cancer almost exactly 3 years ago. That diagnosis, and all of the heartache and roller-coaster to follow, has taught our family (scored into us) how fragile and precious life is. It's taken Dad's struggle of the past few weeks to finally show me that there is more strength packed into people than anyone realizes, and I think that strength is especially magnified when they've got help. :) The recent struggle has also illustrated to me that there are definitely things worse than death. Seems simple, but hard to get through my thick skull some times.

I'd like to close with a special request (that my Mom will probably slap me for). Wednesday, July 23rd is my Mom's birthday. I won't be able to see her, I'll be here in Lincoln, and she'll probably try to spend the day up in Dad's hospital room (like any other day). If you feel at all inclined, please tell her "hi," or send a flower, or even take her out to lunch or something.

Many thanks and much love,
-p